Felt the joy and the fear.

[wolfpangs]

Wow, this week has been insane. Sunday was Salome and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day. It started with an attempt to take out the garbage at my office that should have taken five minutes tops and fifteen minutes later, culminated with beer on my shirt and garbage juice on my foot. Upon returning inside, I realized that it was the foot with the toxic wound--a couple of weeks ago, I woke up at the time I'm usually leaving for class. I stumbled groggily into the bathroom as quickly as I could...and promptly stepped on the plug for my iPod speakers. My reaction? "Eh."

[I have a long history of sustaining brutal foot injuries that I barely notice as other people are cringing. I once stepped on my boyfriend's razor and trailed blood around the floor for ten minutes before I noticed--and it wasn't until I was perched on the bathroom counter watching him clean the cut that I even blinked. Maybe I was bitten by a Goliath Bird Eating Spider and don't remember it. Oh and by the way, if you don't read Cracked, I recommend it. I was thinking of it as the magazine, like a Mad-alike, but the website is great. They combine funny and interesting trivia, which I love, with lists, which I love. Win/win! My only wish was that they'd do something about the comments, so they weren't just scores of spam posts and it looks like they're trying now. But really, it's a worthwhile read. And it's given start_0ver and I the wonderful, all-purpose excuse, "There's a spider near the door." Oh and by the way #2, like many of the commenters, I obviously disagree with their choosing Andrew Jackson. Assbad, maybe. I'll be going to see Some Band tomorrow and missing history, which is a good thing, because we're discussing Jackson. I don't care for him. I always say that I don't hate anyone and I don't hate him but I don't care for him. I don't care for him a lot. And the horse he rode in on. Whoa, this is a big bracket. Let's move on.]

So after that garbage indignity, I fell asleep at my mom's house and woke to an awesome combination charley horse/leg asleep sensation. If you are in the market for a new kind of pain, you should check it out. My leg is still weak. Oh but the best was yet to come: I had to get some cat fud and stuff so I went to the place where they sell walls. Apparently I missed two things in my cart when I was checking out. When I stopped to drop off the cart, I saw them and assumed they'd slid out of a bag, especially since one was on its side. The greeter swooped over and yanked the receipt from my hand, kicking off a ten-minute ordeal in which I was repeatedly asked if I "still wanted" the items I thought I'd bought, heard not one "please" or "thank you" and was generally treated like I was Carlos the effin' Jackal. So that was really sweet. In the store's defense, I filled out a web comment late Monday night and the local store called me yesterday to ask about the incident and apologize.

(I guess it could be worse--I could be like that guy in Ohio who was arrested after he forgot about some Coke* on the bottom rack of his cart. Yeah, he's a master criminal. The $160 worth of groceries he bought was just a ruse for the ultimate prize, the $4 case of Coke.)

And that was basically it for this week so far, minus running around like a maniac trying to get things done so I can go out of town for one measly weekend to see the cutest boys in the world. I made an 87 on that history exam and I guess my instructor doesn't dislike me, because we wrote "Great work" on my essay answers. Multiple choice, not so much. But I wasn't the only one. And I hope he does like me, because he'll be seeing me next semester!

My grandmother's health condition is going to kill me. It's like, "She's doing much better!" Next day: "Her kidneys are failing." Next day: "She looks great!" Next day: "It doesn't look good." I may or may not have tried to strike a bargain with the universe and ooh--my bad, Heston. But I think I'm doing better with that. Now if only the rest of my family would stay safe--my uncle broke his neck yesterday falling off a dropoff in his yard (they live on a very steep hill). The doctors say that they don't think it's a paralyzing break but come on! I gotta get a haircut today. I hope she doesn't accidentally slip and shave me bald.

I could feel sorry for myself, I guess. But I have a house to live in and I go to a good school and I have amazing friends, some of whom I get to see this week. And I know they wouldn't beat me and videotape it just for myspace fodder, so I got that going for me. (Oh and for anyone finding that story hard to believe, I refer you to Cecilia in Virgin Suicides: "Obviously Dr., you've never been a 13-year-old girl.")

*Not soda. Not pop.

Comments

[gannet-guts.livejournal.com]

Oh god, that Cracked article had me rolling on the floor. ♥

[melissa-maples.livejournal.com]

Jesus, guess I'm not the only one who has bad days around here... god, the foot thing, yikes.

[afellowwaitress.livejournal.com]

I hope your family members are doing okay. Sorry about the foot injury, and even sorrier about the garbage juice. yech.

[thestonefox.livejournal.com]

so he forgot about a case of cocaine? i'm confused!

[rockgeisha.livejournal.com]

No, it was a regular case of soft drinks--Pepsi, I think, to be exact. I was referring to the southern habit of calling all soft drinks Coke, rather than soda, pop, or the actual brand name.

But of course, that guy turned out to be a big lying liar and has admitted such, because the surveillance tapes clearly show him putting the drinks on his cart as he was leaving the store, after he paid.